10 realities of Dwight Howard
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Aka VincentDa & RedApples fka Expiredpineapples. My alter-ego is a digital-marketing guy in Houston. Won editing awards & created obsolete flash websites that have been featured in mags like Sports Illustrated. Studied film & women at FSU during the golden age of hip-hop. Collects records, laserdiscs, sports memorabilia & toys. Father of 2 daughters that are more athletic and popular on YouTube.
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Him: “U writing about Dwight soon?”
Me: “Think so. Would u go near him?”
Him: “FUCK NO.”
Me: “What if he wanted to sign with u?”
Him: “I guess we’d have to.”
That was a text exchange between Bill Simmons and “someone who works for one of the 30 NBA franchises” and pretty much how everybody feels about the immature center that is somewhere between Cali and Texas right now.
Nobody really wants to deal with him but if he wanted to become our problem we would have a hard time saying No. I say this about 95% of men in a relationship (dating or married). Most men that don’t cheat are men that don’t have the opportunity to cheat. It’s easy for them to sit back with their male friends and/or tell their wives and girlfriends they would never cheat but if that opportunity landed right in their lap in the form of a hot trouble making women saying I’m here to play then 95% of men would end up playing… and probably paying in the end.
Dwight is that hot trouble making woman that no GM will be able to pass up even if though they are not pursuing him. It’s just a reality. Bill Simmons came up with 10 other realities related to Dwight Howard. You can read in detail about the 10 realities here. I’ll just list them.
- Dwight Howard deserves a max contract, just not a mega-max contract
- Despite everything you just read, the Lakers could give Dwight the mega-max without blinking.
- Dwight Howard peaked already
- Dwight’s offensive game hasn’t improved
- The odds are extremely favorable that Dwight will keep declining
- Dwight Howard can’t handle it
- Lakers fans would flip out if Dwight Howard left
- Dwight Howard just isn’t that entertaining
- Only one franchise makes sense for Dwight
- Despite everything you just read, the Rockets, Mavericks, Hawks, Warriors and Lakers would almost definitely still pay Dwight Howard $118 million over five years
Source: Searching for Dwight Howard